Not only reading it validates my personal view on the subject, that it is beneficial for us and also for others, but it does help me to uncover experiences from my past, that were too deep, too far until now.
Somewhere I read, a few years ago "the past change" and my first reaction was "no way!" But the past can change, at least our perception of it as we look at it in different angles and write about it, to ourself, to others, or speak about it. Even, re-thinking some of them, new insight may come, understanding it more or from another angle.
Telling it to others, means first thinking and uncovering it more deeply; then analyzing it from different angles to see what was really important about that incident for us and, perhaps, even others. Then thinking at it from farther away to be able to relate it "when, where, who, what" and beginning to dramatize it for the audience. All of it, changes somewhat what we feel about it, so it "changes the past."
Lately, I was discovering how much impact my father had on my education and comportment to others. Longtime, I was convinced that only my mother did. Also, I remembered his talent of telling tales, often even Tall tales and anecdotes and they all had also some moral, even if most of them seemed to be there only to laugh.
With a small story, he told me, one can win over seemingly enemies, and turn a heated discussion to a friendly one from then on.
I lost my mother when I was twenty, which encouraged me to believe, as you did, that she had the more profound impact on my formative years. Now my father, who lived to be 87, has been gone for 5 years, I find myself thinking frequently of bits of wisdom he passed on, and the many times that he knew more than I gave him credit for. Perhaps it's because he had so many more years to influence me, but I now find myself to be far more like he than she.
ReplyDelete